After missing a number of weeks, this week I have decided it is time for me to get real, so here goes.
Life is a challenge, sometimes that challenge can become overwhelming resulting in stress, anxiety and yes even depression. Optimism during such times can be our greatest asset, yet it too can suffer the blow of the challenges we face. This is where I have been for nearly a year now, with it spiraling this last month to a place where no creativity thrives and even conscious thoughts struggle to survive. A situation verging on impossible. Faced with decisions that feel like they have no viable solutions. Zapping my optimism as well as my ability to focus, to create, to write.
A while back Michelle at The Space Between Raindrops wrote a post about desperation that really resonated with me. She wrote:
"Desperation breeds attempt. It makes people do things they usually avoid, it unearths latent talent, gets us off the couch, makes us find jobs and research health improvements. Desperation turns us into learners and seekers. Desperation is responsible for the achievement of more than a few of the world’s impossible dreams. Desperation is fuel." Although it has taken weeks, her words have moved me to use this desperation for the positive.
Yes, without going into details which I am sure you don't really want to hear, my situation is desperate. Suffice it to say I have until the beginning of the new year in which to decide if I will give up my dream of making Artistix Network LLC a profitable business, if that is even possible, or close it down. Beyond that, for my sanity I have until May of next year to find a way to become financially independent. Now that may not sound like much of a challenge, however due to various health issues working a regular full time job where I am unable to set my own hours is not possible. So far I have been unable to even obtain a part-time job. With this in mind here are my wishes:
- I wish to find a way to make a livable income from one or more of my talents and abilities.
- I wish for the strength and courage to explore all possibilities, and learn how to make them profitable.
- I wish to regain my optimistic outlook. To take back my life and embrace my life motto.
Oh yes, and Mother Nature ... a bit of sunshine would be real nice about now.
Because the universe is filled with endless possibilities one more wish:
I wish you all a glorious day!
Set the winds in motion with a wish of your own.
4 comments:
As you might know by now, I try not to get very serious in blogland. I don't know if that approach is good or bad. Maybe it's even a coping thing. There seems to be so much serious crap in real life why bring it into our virtual life. But of course it is all one life and perhaps one is more pretend than the other but you end up dealing with real stuff in both. So why my long preamble?
You posted some serious stuff here. Maybe you could use some professional help. Maybe I should shut up? Maybe I could ask others to come over and give support. Maybe I should finish this long comment.
I agree that an optimistic outlook is key but that good attitude needs to be a foundation on which other things like actions that result in satisfying needs. I wish you the best and thanks for the nice wish back to us.
Also Claudya is a great person who probably would have some advice.
Thanks Bill I truly appreciate your supportive comments. This post was much more serious than I generally like to be in blogland. I almost didn't post it because it was so raw, but I am glad I did because it kicked me in gear. I can already feel the optimism seeping back into my life. Never shut up, you are way to smart and funny to do that.
Okay, I had something totally different to say, but then I read the comments and it all changed. To begin with I want to say that I am glad you posted this in "blogland" you have no idea how much it will help you or others. It's important to be honest about where you are and you know what? You expressed where you are emotionally and what your goals are and what changes you need to make, but you didn't share things that shouldn't be shared. I applaud your courage. I really do and I am proud of you for being so open.
Okay, now what I was going to say. You have no idea what opportunities may come your way because of your talents. If you had told me when I started blogging that it would lead to a full time career of writing, from home no less, there is no way I would have dared to dream it because I wasn't in a place to hope for something like that. But I did make tiny wishes that led up to it. I did say to friends close to me, oh I wish I could make a living off of blogging. I said it more as a ridiculous will never come true kind of wish, but it did come true.
So put yourself out there and put your wishes out there too. You are a good writer. Consider pitching stories to sites that you like. You have a blog with writing on it already so you can point to it if you are asked for examples of your writing.
If you think you have an expertise in a certain niche or niches, which I know you do, pitch places that specialize in those topics.
Pitch yourself to places you think wouldn't even be interested. You have NOTHING to lose.
Thank you so much Claudya. I was very apprehensive about making that post but you are so right it has helped me in more ways than I thought possible at the time. Just the process that went into formulating the wishes helped me to gain better focus and boosted my confidence.
I do hope that it can also help others, even if it is only to show them they are not alone.
I really appreciate your suggestions. I would never have thought of pitching stories to other sites. I am not sure how to go about it but I will learn and take your advice.
Post a Comment